Hey there, fellow conversationalists! Today, I want to delve into a topic that's become increasingly important in our social media-saturated society: authentic communication. In a world where Instagram filters and carefully curated feeds reign supreme, it's easy to feel like our day-to-day conversations are following suit—superficial and lacking in depth. But fear not, my friends! I'm here to share some tips on how to engage in genuine, meaningful conversations that foster connection and authenticity.
Be Present: The first step to authentic communication is being present in the moment. Put down your phone, step away from distractions, and give your full attention to the person you're speaking with. Listen actively, make eye contact, and show genuine interest in what they have to say. By being fully present, you create a space for meaningful dialogue to flourish.
Ask Open-Ended Questions: Break free from the confines of small talk by asking open-ended questions that invite deeper reflection and discussion. Instead of asking, "How was your day?" try asking, "What was the highlight of your day?" or "What's been on your mind lately?" or "How are you actually going". These questions encourage your friend to share more about their thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
Practice Active Listening: Authentic conversations are a two-way street. Practice active listening by fully engaging with what your friend is saying, without interrupting or thinking about your response. Validate their feelings, ask clarifying questions, and reflect back what you've heard to show that you're truly listening and empathizing. We have all been there when someone is emotionally checked outta the convo or is actually planning what they'll say next.... so let's pause on our own agenda and be more active listeners.
Share Vulnerably: Break down the walls of perfectionism and embrace vulnerability in your conversations. Share your own thoughts, feelings, and experiences authentically, even if they're messy or imperfect. Vulnerability breeds connection, and by opening up, you invite your friend to do the same, fostering a deeper bond between you.
Be Curious: Approach conversations with a sense of curiosity and openness. Show genuine interest in learning more about your friend's interests, passions, and perspectives. Ask follow-up questions, explore new topics together, and be willing to engage in conversations that challenge your own beliefs and assumptions.
Embrace Silence: Don't be afraid of moments of silence in conversation. Sometimes, the most profound connections can happen in the quiet spaces between words. Allow space for reflection and introspection, and let the conversation unfold naturally without feeling the need to fill every moment with chatter.
Follow Up: Show that you value your friend's thoughts and feelings by following up on previous conversations, maybe you're like me and need to save a reminder in your calendar... if that's you too then do, there's nothing better than making someone feel validated in their feelings and making them feel heard by remembering something they are going through and remembering to check. Check in on how they're doing, ask about developments in their life, and remember details they've shared with you. This demonstrates that you care and are invested in their well-being.
BUT ...
HOLD ON THOUGH: This isn't a push to go sharing your most vulnerable self to your seat buddy at school or your local coffee shop owner. This is a push to say... let's be authentic in how we represent ourselves to our friends and family... let's be discerning in this and consider how much we share with the right people in our lives.
So go ahead, put down your phone, and engage in a conversation that truly matters. Your authentic self and your friendships will thank you for it.